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01 October 2013 @ 11:06 am
Gill/Julie fanfic #3  
This is just a different take on Gill/Julie.

My titles are playing around with those of certain movies, so this one is obviously taken from the movie Gray Matters. I might change the title, I'm not sure, especially as the story isn't finished yet.

Gill Matters

It was a Friday evening, and everyone from Syndicate 9 had gone out for drinks after work. Janet and Rachel were dancing, wine glasses in their hands; Kevin was arm wrestling with Lee and losing, with Mitch and Pete laughing and cheering; meanwhile, Gill was sitting quietly just watching it all. She wasn’t feeling particularly cheerful tonight. It was over between her and Chris, if she was honest with herself it had never really started, and she was once again on her own. Why couldn’t she just find someone who really wanted to be with her?

In all fairness, though, any faith she had had in true love had been shattered by Dave. She wasn’t really upset about breaking up with Chris, he had always been much too young for her, and it was never that serious to begin with; no, it was the fact that it was just another failed relationship with a man. The fact that it had been doomed from the very beginning didn’t seem to count for anything.

Look at them, she thought to herself, watching the team members of her syndicate let loose after a long day at work. They are just out there having fun, enjoying life. Why can’t I do that?

A female voice interrupted her train of thought.

“Hey, ma’am, is this seat taken?”

Gill looked up and smiled when she saw the familiar face of Julie Dodson.

“Hiya slap. How’s life?” Gill responded, and nodded at the empty chair on the other side of the table. Julie sat down, and placed her glass of red in front of her.

“Oh, you know, same old shit really.” Julie shrugged and made a face of mock-disgust.

Gill couldn’t help but chuckle at her best friend; she really did have some funny facial expressions up her sleeve.

“So what’s up with you, then, you mad old cow? Why are you sitting over here all by yourself?” Julie raised her eyebrows.

“Just thinking, I suppose.”

“Woman, you don’t come to the pub to think!” Julie declared, and raised her glass, nodding at Gill to do the same.

“Cheers! Let’s get hammered.” Julie downed her glass. Gill drank whatever was left in her glass as quickly as she could; suddenly getting shitfaced seemed like a really good idea.

“I’ll go get a bottle,” Julie said with a cheeky grin. Gill gave her a thumbs up to show her that she was game.


Two hours and three bottles later, Gill and Julie had joined Rachel and Janet on the dance floor. They were playing Waterloo by Abba, and when Gill started singing along, horribly out of key, Julie joined in, and soon enough all four of them were shouting out the lyrics at the top of their lungs.

“You’re all tone deaf!” Kevin yelled out, and demonstratively covered his ears with his hands. The four women just laughed and continued dancing like there was no tomorrow.

“Hey guys,” Lee said loudly, “we’re thinking about going to that bar up the street. Who’s in?”

“Me!” Rachel called out.

“And me,” Kevin followed.

Gill and Julie looked at each other. “I’m too old for that,” Gill chuckled, and Julie nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, you are, you boring old sod.”

“Oy, shut up, you fat arsed bitch.” Gill crossed her arms and gave Julie her best mean stare.

Julie laughed. “Yeah, there is absolutely no way I’m going to that bar-slash-club place up the road,” she admitted.

“Wanna go back to mine?” Gill suggested. “The kid is away for the weekend, and I’ve got plenty of alcohol.”

“Ooh, you had me at alcohol,” Julie replied.

“Come on, let’s get a taxi.”

They said their goodbyes to the rest of the gang, and stumbled outside.


Fifteen minutes later, they were outside of Gill’s house. Gill fumbled in her handbag for her keys, and eventually managed to unlock the door. She dumped her coat in the hallway, and kicked off her heels. She then went to the kitchen to find a bottle of wine and two glasses.

Julie sat down on the sofa, and not a minute later Gill emerged from the kitchen.

“Here we go,” she said, stumbling a bit.

Julie chuckled slightly at the sight of her drunken best friend. “Cheers my dear,” she chirped as Gill handed her one of the glasses.

Gill sat down next to Julie, and poured the wine, after which she proceeded to drink half the glass in one go.

“So, how’s… Susan? Suzie? Whatever her name is,” Gill asked, knowing Julie had been dating a woman whose name was something along those lines. She was too drunk to remember.

“I don’t really know,” Julie sighed. “I ended it with her a couple of nights ago, it wasn’t really working for me.”

Gill raised her glass towards Julie, and drunkenly said, “Cheers to being single!”

Julie was taken by surprise. Single?

“Are you not seeing Chris anymore, then?” She asked, giving her best friend’s shoulder a sympathetic squeeze.

“Oh, no, we broke up. Last night.” Gill replied, tears welling up in her eyes.

“I’m so sorry, Gill.” Julie put her wine glass down on the table, and put her arms around the smaller woman. Gill put her head on Julie’s shoulder, and allowed the tears to fall down her cheeks.

“I’m sorry,” she choked back a sob. “We weren’t even that serious. It’s not Chris,” Gill said through her tears.

“What do you mean, love?” Julie asked.

“I’m not really upset about breaking up with Chris. It’s just…” Gill trailed off.

“What? What’s wrong?” Julie asked, voice full of concern.

“Nothing. I’m pissed,” Gill sobbed.

“Hey. It’s clearly not nothing,” Julie said. “Just tell me, Gill. Please?”

“It’s stupid, but… I’m scared I’m unlovable, Julie. I’ll probably never find someone who loves me ever again.” Gill looked at Julie with great sorrow on her face. Julie’s heart ached. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Gill - beautiful, smart and funny Gill - thought she was unlovable?

“Oh, love, you are so wrong,” Julie said, struggling to keep control over her emotions as she watched her best friend fall apart.

“Am I, though?” Gill said, wiping tears off her face. “I don’t think I am. I’ve become old and unattractive. Men my age have no interest in me, not when they can get someone who is twenty years younger.”

“Those men are clearly nothing but blind fools,” Julie said in disbelief. She knew Dave – Captain Underpants – was largely to blame for this, for sleeping around behind her back all those years, and for eventually leaving her for a younger woman. Julie absolutely despised that man for what he had done to her best friend.

“You’re just saying that to be nice,” Gill sniffed.

No, I’m really not, Julie thought to herself. You are so gorgeous it sometimes hurts just to look at you.

“Ah, sod it. Crying like this isn’t going to make me any prettier,” Gill said with a small chuckle.

Shut up. You’re gorgeous. I can’t stand it.

Julie just smiled at her best friend, shaking her head slightly. “Gill, you are not unlovable, and you are not unattractive. You’re amazing, you stupid cow.”

Gill returned the smile, but she was still crying. “If that’s true, how come I’ve been single for five years?”

Julie sighed, and looked straight into Gill’s eyes, really feeling the weight and the pain of what her best friend was saying. “You’re not looking in the right places.”

Gill looked confused for a moment. “Right. So where should I look?”

“How about right in front of you?” Julie replied.

Shit. That was out loud, wasn’t it?

“Wha… what?” Gill said, eyes wide.

“You… I mean…” Julie stammered, trying to come up with an excuse for her choice of words. She couldn’t think of anything.

Oh, fuck it.

“Gill,” Julie began, trembling slightly. “Just look at me. You don’t have to look any further to find someone who loves you.”

Gill didn’t understand what Julie was trying to say. “I know you care about me, slap, you’re my best friend, and I love you too.”

“No, Gill, you don’t understand,” she continued, choking back a sob. “I love you. I’m in love with you. I think you are the most beautiful person on the planet. It’s painful to look at you sometimes, you’re so gorgeous. So when you start saying that you’re unattractive, I don’t know whether to laugh or cry, because I have been in love with you for as long as I can remember. I know you’re straight, don’t worry. I know I have no chance with you whatsoever. But Gill, I need you to know that you ARE attractive. You are absolutely stunning, and you’re funny, smart and generally just perfect in every possible way. They should be lining up around the corner for you.”

Gill wasn’t sure she was hearing her best friend correctly. All she could do was stare at Julie, trying to make some sense of it all.

“I’m sorry for throwing all that in your face, Gill. I just couldn’t stand the thought of you feeling that way about yourself. I want you to know that you’re wrong. But I’m happy just being your friend.” Julie was starting to feel a bit nervous; what if she’d fucked everything up by saying all those things? She’d really hate herself if she had compromised their friendship.

For a few minutes they just sat there in silence, trying to process what was happening.

“So are you saying…?” Gill asked carefully.

Julie took a sharp breath, pain spread all over her face. She nodded. “I’m so sorry,” she said. “I shouldn’t have said anything.”

Gill reached out and stroked Julie’s cheek lovingly. “Don’t be sorry,” she whispered, before she leaned in to place a kiss on Julie’s lips.

Julie’s heart was practically beating out of her chest. She was kissing Gill. Her tongue was in Gill’s mouth. Her hands were in Gill’s hair. Gill’s arms were wrapped around her neck. This was the most amazing feeling in the world.

The kiss deepened, and became more passionate. Julie was kissing her best friend desperately; after spending so many years just dreaming about it, it was finally happening and it was so much more incredible than she could have ever imagined. Her head was spinning out of control as she continued to kiss the woman of her dreams.

For a while they just sat there, wrapped up in each other’s arms, making out like a couple of teenagers. Finally, they broke apart, resting their foreheads against each other whilst trying to catch their breaths.

“Wow,” Gill said, still slightly out of breath. She looked up with a smile on her face, but that quickly vanished when she saw that her best friend was crying.

“Is something wrong?” She asked worriedly.

Julie shook her head. “I never in my wildest dreams imagined that this would ever happen.”

Gill felt tears well up in her own eyes. Julie was beautiful.

“It’s important to me that you are absolutely certain that this is what you want, though,” Julie continued. “Because I am so in love with you that it hurts, and it’s going to hurt even more if you let this continue now and then change your mind.” Julie’s voice was shaky with emotion.

Gill reached out and grabbed Julie’s hand. She held onto it as she looked into Julie’s eyes. “Julie, love, I cannot describe the way you’re making me feel. I only know that I never want to stop feeling this way.” She smiled through her tears. “I find it hard to believe that you actually feel that way about me. I look nothing like those women you usually date.”

A small chuckle escaped from Julie’s mouth, and she leaned in to kiss her best friend again. “Of course you look nothing like them, you mad cow. You look like you,” she said, smiling back. “Absolutely perfect.”

“I’m sure you will find that I am far from perfect,” Gill said, gazing at Julie. “You, on the other hand, are beautiful inside and out. I don’t deserve you.”

“Gill,” Julie said, and framed the other woman’s face with her hands. “You are too adorable for your own good. I love you. I love your smile, I love the way you carry yourself and the way you boss people around so effortlessly.”

Gill giggled, and shook her head, but she kept her gaze firmly on Julie.

“I love your sense of humour,” Julie continued. “I love how smart you are, and how dedicated you are to the work you do. I love your witty sarcasm and how quick you are. I love your enthusiasm. I love your kindness. I love how much you care about everyone around you. I love your compassion. I love the way your eyes light up when you get excited. I love how you can make me laugh no matter how shitty my day has been. I could go on for hours, Gill.”

The smaller woman blushed, and looked away for a moment. Julie let go of her face, and grabbed hold of her hand.

“Tell me what you’re thinking,” she said softly.

Gill looked back into her eyes, tears streaming down her cheeks. “I love you, Julie.” She leaned in to kiss the other woman passionately, and Julie responded by putting her arms around her, pulling her closer. She slipped her tongue into Julie’s mouth, and once again Julie responded accordingly.

“Let’s go upstairs,” Gill mumbled into Julie’s mouth.

Julie felt a shiver down her spine. Oh god, it was happening. She pulled back enough to look at Gill lovingly. “Are you sure?”

“Of course I’m sure,” Gill replied, leaning in to capture Julie’s lips with hers once more.


Stumbling into Gill’s bedroom, Julie eventually managed to successfully get Gill onto the bed, and proceeded to pin the smaller woman to the mattress, once again kissing her with an increased level of desperation. She had never wanted anyone the way she wanted this woman. She fumbled with the buttons on Gill’s blouse; she couldn’t get it off soon enough. Once all the buttons had been undone, she kissed her way down Gill’s neck, chest and stomach until she reached the skirt, which she then pulled off and threw on the floor, along with her tights. She kissed her way back up again, from her feet and up to her neck, until her lips were back on Gill’s. Julie could feel Gill reacting to every kiss, every touch, which felt nothing short of amazing. The fact that she could have such an effect on her best friend was absolutely incredible.

Gill was completely lost in a haze of heat and lust. She wanted more; she wanted all of Julie. She started unbuttoning Julie’s shirt, and eventually made her roll over so she could remove the clothing item completely. Sitting on top of Julie, she also finally slipped her own blouse off, and leaned in for yet another passionate kiss.

Making her way down Julie’s upper body with a trail of kisses, Gill eventually reached her target – Julie’s trousers. She unzipped them, and ran her fingers along the lines of Julie’s panties, which were now exposed. Julie whimpered beneath Gill’s touch, which prompted Gill to slowly, but surely, pull Julie’s trousers off completely. Once off, Gill crawled her way back up to lock lips with the other woman, whilst simultaneously placing her knee in-between her legs. A loud moan escaped from Julie’s mouth, and she responded by putting her hand between Gill’s legs, stroking the outside of her panties. “Mm, oh god, Julie,” Gill whispered against Julie’s mouth, before continuing to kiss her best friend with immense passion.

Gill could feel Julie shiver uncontrollably as she trailed off on another adventure down her body. She started tugging at Julie’s bra, and Julie lifted her back up slightly, allowing Gill to unhook it and pull it off entirely. For a moment she just stared at Julie, then she leaned in and put her mouth to her ear. “You’re beautiful,” she whispered softly. Julie felt a shiver running down her spine. “Not nearly as beautiful as you,” she whispered back.

Julie flipped Gill over so she was back on top. She removed Gill’s bra, and started kissing and stroking her breasts tenderly. She could feel Gill whimpering beneath her. “Please don’t stop,” she heard her mumble. Julie wouldn’t think of stopping at this point! She made her way down to Gill’s panties, which by now were completely soaked, and she decided to just pull them off. Gill’s breathing was getting increasingly heavy and unsteady. Julie inserted one finger, and then another, inside of Gill. The other woman’s uncontrolled whimpering let Julie know that she had found the right spot, and she started rubbing her fingers against it. She could feel Gill’s body tensing up with every wave of pleasure, and she heard her mutter a string of expletives under her breath, which she was fighting hard to remain in control of. Finally, Gill climaxed. “Oh god!” She moaned loudly, digging her fingers into the mattress to stop herself from making any loud and shrill noises. Julie ran her hands along Gill’s upper body before placing a tender kiss on her lips.

“You’re amazing,” Gill whispered, kissing her back.

Julie fell back onto the mattress, and pulled Gill into her arms. Gill settled into the other woman’s embrace, and sighed happily.

“It’s funny,” Julie said, after a while, whilst treading her fingers through Gill’s hair. “After all the years I’ve spent fantasizing about kissing you, wondering what it would be like, and imagining you naked… the reality turned out to be such complete crap.”

“Oh, fuck off, will ya!” Gill exclaimed, slapping Julie’s shoulder.

Julie rolled over so she was gazing down at Gill. “No, honestly,” she said. “Doing this…” She leaned in and covered Gill’s lips with hers, kissing her lovingly, before pulling away again to look into her eyes, “…feels so much better than I could ever have imagined.” She smiled, and felt her eyes go blank with tears. “And of course, however beautiful you look in my head, it cannot compare to the actual real-life you.”

Gill pulled Julie’s face down to once again kiss the other woman. It felt amazing to be this close to her, and even better to hear her say those words.

“There’s no way I look better in real life than I do in your head,” Gill said, once she had settled back into Julie’s embrace.

Julie chuckled. “Stupid cow,” she muttered underneath her breath.

Gill laughed softly. “Goodnight, slap,” she said, and snuggled even further into the other woman’s arms.


Gill woke up the next morning, feeling a bit disoriented and with a bit of a headache, but she didn’t feel too bad. She quickly realised where she was and who she was with, and thought to herself that the sheer bliss she was feeling about what had happened last night probably had something to do with the apparent absence of a monster hangover.

Gill had always thought of herself as straight. She’d thought about the idea of being with a woman, of course, having gone to gay bars with Julie a few times and having had women hit on her more than once. She had found herself thinking that maybe she would be open to it, if the right person came along, but so far that hadn’t happened. But this was Julie. This was her very best friend in the whole world. It wasn’t like she was now playing for the other team; this didn’t mean that she was now gay. It just meant that she was in love with this one specific person. Suddenly, placing yourself in a box like that – putting yourself into a category – seemed to make absolutely no sense. She didn’t want to play for any team anymore. She wanted to stand in the middle of the field and shout, “STOP!” She didn’t want to play by anyone’s rules. There should be no rules attached to love.

She rolled over slightly to check the time on her phone. Six o’clock in the morning – way too early to be so deep, she thought, and smiled slightly at herself. She turned back around to face the woman who was still fast asleep next to her. She knew there were a lot of things they would inevitably have to talk about, but for now she just wanted to enjoy lying next to her. She closed her eyes and drifted back to sleep.


Julie stirred from her sleep, yawned, and sat up. As she noticed the petite figure that was her best friend lying, still asleep, next to her, the events of the previous night came rushing back to her. Did that really happen? It seemed so much more likely that it had been a dream – a very elaborate one – because there was no other logical explanation for it. She gazed down at Gill; she could stare at her for ages. She looked so peaceful.

Just when Julie was about to start looking for her phone, she felt Gill shift slightly, and turned around to see the other woman sit up and rub her eyes.

“Good morning,” Julie said lovingly.

“Morning, love,” Gill replied sleepily.

“How are you feeling?” Julie asked.

“Fantastic,” Gill said, smiling.

Julie let out a small sigh of relief, and leaned in to place a quick kiss on Gill’s lips. “Me too,” she said, smiling back at the other woman.

For a minute, the two best-friends-turned-lovers just sat there gazing into each other’s eyes.

“This doesn’t seem real to me,” Julie finally said. “Perhaps it’s because I’ve had about a million different dreams about how this would happen.”

Gill could feel tears prickle in her eyes. When did she become this sentimental?

“Oh god, listen to me,” Julie said, sniffling slightly. “I must sound pathetic.”

Gill shook her head. “Not at all, slap.” She leaned in and put her head on Julie’s shoulders, and then picked up the other woman’s hand, intertwining their fingers.

They sat like this for a few minutes, just enjoying the silence and each other.

“Goodness, I need to go find my phone!” Julie suddenly exclaimed. “I don’t even know what the time is.” She untangled herself from Gill and moved to sit on the edge of the bed, covering herself with the sheets whilst trying to locate her clothes.

Gill reached for her own phone, which was on the nightstand next to her. “It’s 7:45, slap.”

“Right. I need to go into work for a few hours. I left some unfinished paperwork last night to go hang out with you instead, and it has to be done by Monday morning so I have to go in now. I don’t regret coming to see you instead, though, not for a second. Totally worth it!” Julie said, turning around to give Gill a cheeky smile.

“Of course it was,” Gill replied with a grin, raising her eyebrows.


While Julie was in the bathroom getting dressed, Gill slipped into her morning robe and went downstairs to put the kettle on and make some breakfast. She was in the middle of a rendition of “I Could Have Danced All Night” when Julie walked in.

“Singing show tunes again, are we Gill?” She asked, with a hint of laughter in her voice.

Gill turned around with a huge smile on her face. “Gill isn’t here. I’m Julie Andrews.”

Julie laughed at her best friend’s morning silliness.

“Tea and toast?” Gill asked, putting the plates on the table.

“Ooh, yes please.” Julie sat down, and Gill went to get the cups of tea still standing on the kitchen counter.

“Here you go,” she chirped as she went to sit down in the chair opposite her best friend.

“Cheers, my love,” Julie said, taking a sip of her tea.

They ate their breakfast in silence; Gill was reading the paper and Julie was checking her emails on her phone. Fifteen minutes later, Julie was in the hall putting her shoes and coat on.

She was just about to walk out the door when Gill stopped her. “Wait,” she said quickly. Julie turned around to face the other woman. Gill raised herself up on her toes and put her arms around Julie’s neck. She smiled, and leaned in to capture the taller woman’s lips with her own.

“I love you, slap,” she said, once the kiss had ended. “I miss you already.”

“I love you too, you mad cow,” Julie said softly. “I wish I didn’t have to go in today. I’ll hurry back, shall I?”

Gill nodded, and went in to kiss her once more, before reluctantly letting her go.

“I’ll text you when I’m done,” Julie said, before walking out and closing the door behind her.


Gill had the day off, so after Julie left she had a three-hour long nap, before taking a nice long bath. She found herself unable to stop smiling; she couldn’t remember feeling this happy in a very long time – if ever. She kept checking her phone every five minutes, as well, which seemed nonsensical to her when she thought about it because this was Julie, her best friend, someone who she was used to receiving texts from on a very regular basis. And yet, thinking about receiving a text from Julie right now made her feel all giddy and excited. My god, Gill, pull yourself together, woman. It’s just Julie, for goodness sake. But however hard she tried, she could not shake the images of Julie lying on her bed naked, and then she felt that jolt in the pit of her stomach all over again.

Gill flicked on the TV, and tried to focus her attention on something else. Waiting for Julie to text was driving her insane.

About half an hour into some romantic comedy or other, her phone buzzed with a notification. Gill made a leap towards the table to fetch her phone. It was a message from Sammy.

Hi mum. I’m probably gonna be home Monday morning instead, as dad is taking me to a concert Sunday evening. Is that okay? x

Gill quickly replied, saying of course, that’s fine, and put her phone back on the table. As soon as she’d done that, it buzzed once again. This time it was from Julie.

Hiya. I’m just on my way over, went home to have a shower and a change of clothes. See you in a bit. J x

Gill suddenly felt really nervous, for reasons she didn’t even understand. Oh god, I need to change out of these sweats, she thought, and ran upstairs to her bedroom. Once there, she pulled out a pair of skinny jeans and a white blouse, which she then proceeded to change into. She hastily applied some makeup, and went downstairs to tidy up a bit before Julie arrived.

She had just sat down on the sofa when the doorbell went off. She could feel her heart racing as she walked down into the hallway.

As soon as she had opened the door, Julie had scooped her up into her arms, and before she knew it Julie’s lips were pressed against her own. She then closed the door behind her with her foot, and swung Gill around to pin her up against the door. She proceeded to kiss her girlfriend with increased passion, until they’d both run out of breath. They broke apart, reluctantly, and Julie rested her forehead against Gill’s.

“That’s all I’ve been able to think about, all day,” she said, still trying to catch her breath after the intense make-out session.

“No complaints from me,” Gill whispered, and smiled softly. “My mind has gone there a few times, too, since I last saw you.” Her smile turned cheeky. “My train of thought didn’t stop there, though.”

Julie chuckled. “Is that an invitation?”

Gill crinkled her nose, and started walking backwards. “Come on, then. The last person to get out of their clothes is buying dinner!”

cinnamon68cinnamon68 on May 3rd, 2014 08:16 pm (UTC)
Gill Matters
I really love this story; fantastic dialogue and descriptive passages, in just the right balance!